Pokémon: The Episode
by TheMortalSlab
Summary: This "choose your own adventure"-style masterpiece thoroughly analyzes the complexities behind writing an episode of Pokémon.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey Nintendo, how ya doin?**

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><p><strong>POKÉMON: THE EPISODE<strong>

**Episode 1: Ash Meets Girl**

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><p><strong>Ash does something stupid and losespisses off his Pokémon, so it gets stolen/wanders off. Ash feels bad and starts to follow it. He marvels at the new surroundings and has a stupid flashback involving one of few enjoyable moments with said Pokémon. This is shortly followed by his Pikachu pissing off Girl. Girl gets mad and yells at Ash, and he feels obligated to pay her back for the ruined bike/electric attack. Girl agrees and decides to help him find his Pokémon.**

**They camp out for the night, and continue searching the next morning. Ash and Girl begin to argue, realizing they have very little in common, and continues throughout the remainder of the episode. They meet a new Pokémon that Ash wants to catch. He stupidly throws himself at the Pokémon, and gets attacked. Girl shows sympathy for three seconds, and they begin to argue again, giving the Pokémon a chance to escape. This Pokémon appears two more times in the series, which ends with its capture/imminent defeat in which Ash decides not to capture it.**

**Ash and Girl continue arguing all the way to First City, where Nurse Joy explains the whereabouts of his missing Pokémon. They then backtrack to the previous route, where they discover a dormant Team Rocket, who still has/now has his Pokémon! Ash yells at them, deciding not to attack them while they weren't aware of his presence. Team Rocket springs up and proclaims their original/new stupid motto that barely/doesn't rhyme. Ash gets angrier and tells Pikachu to attack. Team Rocket laughs and deflects the attack easily. They rub their dick all over their new device and make fun of Ash and Girl. Girl calls Team Rocket stupid and they attack her, but somehow miss her and knock her aside. Ash gets pissed and jumps on the mechanism. Team Rocket knocks him off/tries to kill him, somehow freeing the encased Pokémon. Ash reunites with his stupid Pokémon shortly, and uses it to attack Team Rocket's defenses. He then uses Pikachu to shoot them away. Ash and Girl make up, and Girl decides to follow Ash for seemingly no reason.**

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><p><strong>To be continued…<strong>


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey Nintendo, how ya doin?**

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><p><strong>POKÉMON: THE EPISODE<strong>

**Episode 2: Ash Catches His First Useless Pokémon**

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><p><strong>The episode begins with minor grievances between Ash and Girl as they walk through a repetitive forest, probably resulting in Ash getting totes burned. They argue for a short while until Ash hears something uninteresting from the nearest opening. He sees a dumb Pokémon getting attacked by rather awesome-looking Pokémon. Instead of helping, he pulls out his Pokédex and gets useless information on the Pokémon that lay before him. One of the awesome Pokémon does some sweet special attack, and Ash jumps in front of it and falls to the ground. While the audience laughs, Girl, Pikachu &amp; the stupid Pokémon run to Ash's aid, only to have him sit up and ask if the Pokémon's okay. The Pokémon nods, and the cool Pokémon attack once more. Ash orders Pikachu to take them out with some fancy electric attack, while the audience and Girl wonder why he didn't just do that in the first place. Pikachu sends the sweet Pokémon flying, and they all have a hearty laugh for no reason.<strong>

**Time passes, and they all found berries to eat. The sun begins to set in the East, but no one notices the obvious flaw. As Pikachu and the dumb Pokémon are playing grab-ass, a big pink hand snatches the two, only to reveal that they have been taken by the almighty Team Rocket! Ash and Girl announce the trio's presence, which is followed by their original/new stupid motto that barely/doesn't rhyme. Ash commands Pikachu to attack, but their machine is made of rubber, or something. Instead of using her Pokémon, Girl just sits pretty while Team Rocket laughs at Ash's stupidity. The dumb Pokémon gets angry, and uses some special ability that frees both itself and Pikachu. Pikachu then sends Team Rocket flying, while they act like Dr. Seuss for their last ten seconds of airtime.**

**After another hearty laugh, the dumb Pokémon gets in battle position. Ash just acts confused and Girl has to explain that the Pokémon wants to battle him. A sparkle emits from his virgin eyes, as he calls Pikachu into battle. Despite Pikachu being at level sixty-something, the stupid Pokémon proves to be quite the adversary. After several minutes of false intensity, the Pokémon faints, and Ash throws the Pokéball, and while it's obvious that it's caught, Ash, Girl & Pikachu look on with suspense. The ball stops wiggling, and Ash squeals like a girl, but not like Girl. Girl pretends to be happy for Ash, and they begin to travel back to First City for Ash to obtain the Noobie Badge.**

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><p><strong>To be continued…<strong>


End file.
